Tuesday, February 5, 2013

The Scuttlebutt

Scuttlebutt is a fun word that always reminds me of Dwight Schrute. If you don't know what it means, take a moment to look it up. Boom. Education.

Annnnyway, I thought I'd give an update on the life and times of the Richardsons. We're still pregnant. This baby could be born any second. I'm enjoying teasing people on Facebook, but don't worry, I'm not terribly private, and it won't be a secret when he arrives. Ephraim was born on his due date, so this little one is already less punctual than his big brother. The question is, will he be earlier or later than his big sister, who arrived 5 dates after her EDD. So, let me take this opportunity to remind all people of the law of averages. A due date is an average. This 40-week average is determined because some babies are born before that time, and some are born after that time. It's okay to continue on with pregnancy past one's "due date." A due date is not like an alarm clock or a bomb. Believe me, pregnant women who go beyond the average are ready for their babies to come. In general, they are also incredibly annoyed with the questioning and pressure. Some total stranger asks you when you are due, and you say "yesterday." Their eyes get big and round, and they say something like, "Oh my gosh, what are you going to do!!?!?!" You think, but do not say, "Probably punch you in the face. As far as having the baby, I'm sure it will happen." I, of course, am in this really weird situation of trying to buy a house and move, as well as have a baby, so I'm not sure I'm in a hurry to give birth (sometimes). So, let me shift gears.

We are still under contract to close on the house on or before February 8, 2013. We still do not have a closing date. We are again, stuck waiting on someone else's paperwork. I have NO CLUE if it will get done in time and/or if we will be able to close by FRIDAY. I am now in this totally weird, sore, tired, anxious place of hoping and praying I don't experience a collision of birth and a closing date. Forgive my pessimism, but due to the extraordinarily efficient functioning of Murphy's Law in our life lately, I'm fully expecting this outcome... and then a series of glitches and paperwork screw-ups to make it impossible to set a new closing date for another month or some such nonsense.

So, am I anxious for the baby to be born? Yes and no. Partly, I'd like to go into labor TODAY, get the kid out, and not have to worry about birth colliding with a closing date. Partly, I'd like to keep him on lockdown, close on the house first, and then loose his chains. Either way, I'll be literally NO HELP with moving, and there are several things that have to be done at the house before we can actually move in (at least a week's worth of work). Yes, I will be heavily recruiting volunteers to help my poor husband, who will bear this burden alone.

My body is doing lots of things to let me know it's getting ready to expel a baby, but it's been lots of starting and stopping. Stress related? Probably not. Everything's totally fine. What are you talking about!?? ;)

This week is the top of the hill on a rollercoaster. We are sitting there, ready to puke, not knowing what on earth is going to happen. If you're a praying person, I would ask that you pray in vague generalities for us ;) because I have truly no CLUE what to pray, or what to do.

So, that's the scuttlebutt. I will continue to annoy you with vague status updates, as it brings me great joy and entertainment in this time. Consider it your penance for my pregnancy. ;)

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