Today (November 22, 2010) is Quincy's 34th Birthday! Happy Birthday Hon!
Quincy and I met in July 2001. The night that I met him, I went home and told my mom that I'd met the man I was going to marry. About a month later, we were engaged! ;) I know that sounds completely insane to so many people, but insane seems to be the story of our life sometimes! We were married in May 2002, and that's all she wrote! We've had all sorts of ups and downs, adventures, and done lots of growing up together so far. I pray that God will allow us to do lots more!
Quincy is truly the godliest man I've ever known. I don't say this as a slight to any other men, but I say it because I can really only speak with authority about the one man with whom I do life on a daily basis. He was one of the first people I ever met who loved God and lived that way on a day-in, day-out basis. For him, Jesus has never been a weekend hobby. He behaves the same exact way in church on Sunday that he does at work on Monday or at home on a Saturday. His life is for and about God. He seriously understands that. That is how he lives.
I am so blessed to have married a man like Quincy. I can be a handful (to put it lightly), and he is the perfect combination of strong and gentle to bring balance to our marriage. He has consistently made me desire to be a better person, a better lover of God, a better wife, and a better mother. It is really inspirational to live with someone who is consistently doing the right things, making the hard choices, stepping out and living with radical faith, and never really needing credit for any of it.
Quincy loves "The Lord of the Rings" trilogy, and although it will probably really irritate him that I say this, he is totally the Samwise Gamgee of the story. He's just loyal and faithful. He's often in the background. He's not the star of the show, but he's regularly in the position of "carrying the star." Watch this clip if you don't know what I am talking about.
For a more Biblical comparison, he is Aaron. I will never forget when we were in labor with Ransom, knowing our little one had gone to be with Jesus, that Quincy was literally holding up my arms as I was praising God in that storm. He was a husband, a father, a friend, and an Aaron. (Exodus 17)
Though there is an aspect of hardship associated with the life God has called us to live, I truly recognize how incredibly blessed we are as a family. We are all at home, together. Almost every time I tell someone that my husband works from home, I get responses like, "Oh wow. How do you not kill each other?." and so on. Here's the answer. We love each other. We truly, genuinely love to be together. The reality is that even though he is working from home, we really don't see each other or talk to each other most of the day, but it is a great luxury to be able to call for help if it's really needed. When the kids are napping, I can waltz right in to my husband's office and talk with him as he works. We eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner together every single day. We love being together. Honestly, there is no one I'd rather hang out with than my husband. He's smart, funny, interesting, thoughtful, encouraging, and the kind of person that just always prods others to be better. I love that about him.
I also love that my husband's heart is truly for our family. I know I'm in the vast minority of women when I say that my husband regularly sacrifices other "stuff" to be with his family, without a single word from me. In a sense, it would be even easier for him to get bogged down with tons of activities because he's at home all day, but he just doesn't do that. He really recognizes and lives in such a way that his priorities are reflected in his life. God first. Family second. Everything else. That "God first, family second" can be such a difficult thing, especially for men called to ministry because defining "God activities" can be really tricky. I cannot tell you how many churches I've been a part of where the direction of I Timothy 3:4-5 was completely ignored. A church leader must "manage his own household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive, for if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God's church?" Unfortunately, we also had a brief season in our own lives when this was a bit out of whack. My husband very quickly recognized and remedied this issue.
I want to tell you a little story about that. Quincy may not ever really know how much this meant to me, but maybe some other wives out there will get what I'm saying. Quincy is a musician. He used to be part of the Ascension worship team, playing at different venues once a month. I know this was really important and special to Quincy for several years and an integral part of our lives and his ministry. Well, our family began to hit a wall of "busy-ness." Quincy was in the role of a head pastor, was running his own business, was playing with Ascension (who also practiced once a week at the time), and we had a new baby boy. One day, he sat down and evaluated his priorities and time. He let me know he was quitting Ascension. It was just that simple. Basically, his dad role was defeating his musician role. I know this was a tough choice for him, and I know he grieved it and did not take it lightly. I also know he recognized that the Ascension ministry was truly God's ministry, and God would not have Quincy sacrifice his role in the father ministry for the sake of outside ministry. He really recognizes and believes in the ministry of the HOME. That's a tough thing for any of us, but I can say without a doubt, that my husband gets it. Our family is important to him. Our kids are important to him. I am important to him... and we all know it. When he walked away from Ascension, though, that was really overwhelming to me. I think about it even now. Any time we attend an Ascension event, I know that part of him misses the music, the worship, and the camaraderie. I also know that he continues to choose us. I can't explain what a blessing it was for me to be on the receiving end of that choice, without ever having said a word to him about it. I am thankful that he seeks God's plan for our life, and acts on it.
Quincy is talented and creative. He is a web designer/graphic designer by trade, but he is an artist at heart. He always has a clipboard in hand, and doodling is his way of taking notes. He can draw and paint the most beautiful things, though he often does not have time for it. It's just another one of those sacrificial things. Quincy loves woodworking. He sits in front of a computer all day long, so I know that he just loves being able to work with his hands and build things. He is very detail oriented and will draw and plan projects for weeks! I'll be honest. This sometimes drives me bonkers! I'm impulsive and prefer my projects to go from a thought to finished in one day. Hopefully, we bring "balance to the force."
Quincy is kind and humble. I pretty regularly feel like a totally horrible person when I look at my husband's heart. He loves people. He thinks the best of others. He is not judgmental at all. He cries openly and is totally unashamed of that. He is tender and gentle. He is not proud. He asks for help when he needs it. He is willing to be taught and to submit himself to another.
Quincy is an amazing dad. Every day, Quincy spends time doing devotions with Ephraim, and doing chores alongside him. Ephraim has a dad who purposefully sets aside time to teach him about the things of God and the more practical things of life that he can do to contribute to and honor the rest of the family. Ephraim has a daily model of a truly godly man living life before him. Ephraim pretty regularly says, "I want to be just like Daddy when I grow up." I always reply, "I want you to be just like him, too." Quincy always replies, "I want you to be better than me." I know that Aspen has the bar set very high for the type of man she will marry. She will see her daddy firsthand, and any fella that comes into her life will have VERY big shoes to fill. I am so thankful she will not be duped by anything less than a sacrificial, godly love.
Quincy is a wonderful husband. He lays down his life for me every single day. He loves me, and he shows it in real and tangible ways. I could ramble on about him for days, but I think you get the point. He's awesome.
I am so blessed to have married such a man, and I am thankful to celebrate his birthday with him today!
I love you, Quincy! Happy Birthday! May your 34th year be richly blessed! :)